My Friend: a gift of God

"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow.
Don't walk behind me, I may not lead.
Walk beside me and be my friend."

A very special tribute to friendship. I do have other special friends but debut demands bham’s name…
Bham or Subham Dasgupta or subho… whatever u guys know him to be… he is a real friend to us…especially me, who has counted friends. I do not belive in diplomacy and that’s why may be my friend circle do not constitute a huge crowd. How bham n me have become close frnz is another topic of debate…although he is jus the opposite at times.

Year 2005
Place : Presidency premises, Physiology Dept.
Setting: the dept. corridor..
An extra pounded fellow with a cotton cloth bag timidly walks towards the lecture theatre.We had supposedly completed a PM’s lecture. Already two weeks of college was over and mostly all teachers been vividly introduced to us and vice versa. The class gets over and I walk out timidly following Neelanjan, my classmate who like the ever-best-friend-of-the-unknown runs to greet the fellow. Flabbergasted, I watch as the 2 quintals of flesh bounce to each other called sumwot like a “hug”…. I chuckle. Being the thinnest girl in my school as well as this class, I really admire the fact that I will be doing classes with these two fellows.They instantly remind me of humpty dumpty… how about a photograph framed with them???... well, there are such instances as u can see…
Many other classmates surround him [ he still cud be seen] , while I stand out.
“which school?...section?.. where do you stay?... oh Jadavpur!!! … ok ok.. South point?.. ok , do u know that guy?.. wow, I studied in that tution, how come I never saw you?.. but I did..”…they hurled at him..
“Subham… Subham Dasgupta…no no… Bijoygarh.. Hi.. yes, Pradhan sir’s tution… “ he tried to answer them coolly..
The Questionnaire session carried on till some proff, I don’t remember, interrupted.I was still an onlooker. I dint care to go up and ask him anything,… another kolkatan.. I sighed. !!!

Setting: LT, AKS’s dictation class..
23 students seated in the class taking Haematology notes.. They r in 4 rows, the tallest at the bak..[I don’t know why, the LT was a gallery, it dint matter much ]1st row filled with gals, 2nd row filled with gals + agni sitting immediate beside madhu.

This proff was supposed to teach us Haematology. The only thing he did was dictate from a papyrus-like notebook whose insurance I think he has done ofcourse,coz if he hasn’t ,his teaching career would go down the drains… I don’t know from where he had stolen it coz he cant pronounce all its words properly.. That one thin notebook is getting his monthly salary, year after year, batch after batch…. Anyways..
Where am I??... well guys, I am not in the class coz am late…!!! Yeah… as usual..!!
Simply running through college street, I dash through the colg premises, speeding through the monstrous stairs and bumping at the LT door.. I ask my fellow mates.. in sign language..” when did it start?”… Bham looks up.. he signals 2 enter.. and re-concentrates on eyeing sakshi…!!!.. he was simply not writing the dictation..
I feel devastated to find AKS inside. I eye bham badly, he doesn’t care, he was busy dancing in some park with sakshi in his day-dream… AKS smiles..thats it!!!.. well readers, I was just 35 mins late..in a 1.5 hr class.. that’s taken, right??

Bham’s crush: Sakshi Arora, a Punjabi hindu gal, extremyly fair and beautiful,the owner of Xerox shop which supplied huge Xerox just before the exams and also miniature copies for last minute rescue…. Despaired over her extra weight, post- waxing eruptions and the uncountable vrats she did. To top it all…she was commited to a Bong Guy… yeah….!!!!.. spent her time talking to her bf over phn, loitering in the romantic corridor n Bham staring with painful eyes at her..
“Bham, what’s up??”.. I enquire.
“nothing”….all he says.. I don’t delve deep into conversation. He was the metro-group guy n me the train-group gal, our friendship still germinating inside the seed coat, still uncertain of any long term investment.

Yr: 2005
Setting: Indian Coffee house
About 5 or 6 of us seated in around table in the most legendary adda place of kolkata …

Bham: ritu, do you have a boyfriend???
Me, a bit shocked: No.. I mean not really..
That was the first personal question he asked me… and today,…. I keep telling him personal things even if he is not interested.. lolz!!!
He is the only person who checks out differences in my mood, behaviour and classifies my smile to be real or superficial. He is the only person other than my sis who catches the ‘sumthing-wrong’ in me and really cares to do it right… the only guy who gets my news time to time and is updated with all my moods, I guess..
A declaration: If you do not get any news of me, call bham, he knows it obviously till the last second.
[2414-0088… that’s his landline no. DO NOT CALL, he will be throttled to death by his parents.]

1 year roll by… its second year… study time.. things have changed a bit.. the friend pairing goes as follows:
Me n agni, the BCL couple[ BCL= British Council Liabraries], bham pairing with madhu, sakshi- pri has cozied up, linz- chadan as bossom buddies, uti- jana still in premarital relationships but producing excellent muscle-twitch curves at the experimental classes…, neelu-sayan-sugs liked sharing the bed n books as always..madhu-suvosree contributing to the future of bengal politics rest have left either by qualifying MBBS or some sort of engineering course..

Bham: The legendary WBJEE aspirant.
Coming from a extremely education-rich background and surrounding as well, he was supposed to do MBBS, that’s another fate, he didn’t qualify the the state medicine entrance. His family depressed at his failure and he, suppressed by their ways. He got through Presi entrance and then struggled through the 2nd waiting list and reached us after Shreyoshi left for SMU biotech.., replaced her rather.
Bham was sitting for MBBS state entrance for the 3rd time and he himself made it a funny topic at the coffee table..my 5 yrs youger sister asked me whether bham –dada would giv WBJEE with her or not…!!!
How much we frnz understood his position but I wish his family too had done the same. He has his own passions: videography, photography[ my best pics clicked by bham] , pnpc, a great foodie[ plz go through his blog where he has rated around 25 resturants of kolkata in terms of food, its quality n service]…and a very adorable frnd. I treasure bham.

Year:2010
Setting: My new south kolkata flat..[ a shooting destination pre-planned by Bham]
Me, badly dressed, receiving news via sms that the duo is gonna arrive …I don’t change. Let it be.. its jus bham and agni.I don’t need to.

Bham and agni turn up at 3.30 pm.. I fry some fish chops which finishes within minutes.. then omlette, fruits n so on..
The main aim was to shoot a cozy scene of our film spoof: Ravanayam. Remake of Raavan!
Me: Mandodhrari , Agni: Raavan..
Suddenly munching fish fry, bham tells: ritu, take off whatever u r wearing..
Me, aghast: whatttttt?
Bham: I mean…change into some proper Indian wear. We r gonna shoot.
Bham demands to get all my make up I have there.. nevertheless to say, it was just a kajal n a lip gloss.. some not-so-cool dresses n he insists my hair to let loose in hot June afternoon.
“this is enuf, ritu!!!... u will do cool with this only..”.. bham remarks..
I nod him unsure of his still gestating ideas about Raavanayam…
The scene was a romantic one.. bham ties a small pony behind agni’s head 2 giv raavan a SRK look[ to be honest, his mane outshone mine, hence 2 cover up]. An uncomfy Agni is said to get closer and closer to get a close up.. with me.. [coz he was out-of-frame] after trying our level best, when I and agni reach an out-of-focus distance, we burst out laughing…. Agni n ritu has never-ever been able to deliver a romantic scene.. result: Agni and I rolling in laughter in the floor and the director-cum-script writer getting angry with every passing moment..
“will you guys be serious?… am not getting shooting dates.. only 1 song shot with Seeta[ linz] and u, the royal couple is not al all serious..”….. bham simply shouted…
Class 3 kids after getting badly spanked got serious n restarted the shoot, n gave an excellent take in just one go…!!...
Bham and I shared on-screen as well as off-screen chemistry. We used to shoot the talk shows of Doordarshan together at Jadavpur TV Centre. Our main aim was to have an early dinner at Banzara, our favourite hang out , a dimly lit area where chicken and prawn coudnt be distinguished from each other, no matter we ate happily.
Bham: ritu, abhijitda told about another episode next week, will u go?
Ritu: no way bham, I am not interested. I don’t receive pay checks in proper time. I am simply not going.
Bham: plz ritu…lets go… we can have food there afterwards.
As the two of us quarrel through college street, ppl around just cant imagine how 2 such indiv can be a couple..our weight-difference was same as the percentage we received in our graduation…some even laughed, some considedered us blind… in luv !!!.. we dint care. We loved each other in our special way. No gf-bf liaisons involved.
After nagging for 15 mins or so, I give in.. I take the pains of doing horrifying make up 4 half n hour at the studio, 6 hrs of shooting n then get rewarded with an excellent evening out with bham.

The bhai fota session

Linz and I very religiously do this. I starve since morning diligently only this particular day coz the person really matters. We collect all goodies n very traditionally perform the ritauals, our MSc classmates getting green with jealousy seeing our electrovalent bonding.

Year : 2008
Place : Rhesap, a hill station in north Bengal
Setting: 10,000 ft above sea level, hill top, we went for trekking, now I am almost breathess lying in bham’s arms.., 13 frnz surrounded me, linz playing real life doctor-doctor spraying steroid puffs in my respiratory canal, agni in the verge of tears, sayan-neelu trying 2 get transport help 2 the nearest health care I guess.., madhu feeding me hot water, uti,chadan rubbing my feet n hands, jana ,I guess pacifying me as I wept silently thinking about my end ,devoid of my family members…my right fist clutching bham’s jacket tightly… I faint. The last words I hear ..”ritu, ritu…

At the guest house bak after the trauma,“will you have an poach?...” I see bham saking with a smile, a plate of egg poach in his hand. He had ordered that for himself, but feed me instead… he takes real care of me as we head homewards after this disastrous excursion climax.I wish we were blood-related.

I cant exactly say when I and bham became close frnz.. But it got glued more with the post graduation years, now a Fevicol Relation. How my heart along with many others, ached when bham dint get through in biotec-genetics –neuro entrance. Then after 2-3 months, miracle ocuured n bham comes to south campus to do classes with the physiopal batch. Uti-jana lying at the north campus with their off-screen chemistry.But still a get together organiser , he is the string of the necklace called PHYSIOPALS.No damn gf, bf or even a 50-50f can break our friendship. We quarrel the most..topic related or unrelated. Any sort of tension and bham gets his usual dose of “stress buster episode” from me. I vent out all types of frustration 2 bham.. Linz being my next best choice, both r great confiders. Any irritation… call bham n vent out. Ha ha.. jokes apart, I really get hurt when he behaves irrationally and both of us ending into tears. Obviously we make up within a day or two… the ill effects being badly flashed in social networking sites as emotional taglines…
“u guys have quarreled??”…agni asks.. no answer. We have quarreled for the Nth time and agni is the central point which bham and me uses as media during quarrel, sometimes Linz replaces agni. But we make up.

Cutting out shortly,

• This guy shamelessly fidgets through Gariahaat to buy a ladies dress and forces me to change while still in colg, just 2 see me how I look..
• This guy fights for me amongst all my enemies and supports me inspite of my shortcomings, so does linz n agni.
• This guy invites me over his place and takes all risk although he knows well that he will b badly questioned after I leave as I was the only gal who went with 4 guys.
• This guy dies with tension if I do not reach home by 10 after 1 of those heavy shoot schedule.
……and many more such instances..

I don’t know where we would end up in the next 10 years but I really don’t wanna be out of touch from Bham… there r many ppl backing this blog…
Lastly, bham.. I luv you..



























PS. Well readers, Bham is alive… I just wrote this piece coz it came to my mind and Bham dearest… stop weeping , if u r at all doing so after reading this….